I’m standing at the baggage claim area in Toronto, Ontario waiting for my luggage to arrive. I don’t often check luggage when I travel, but on this occasion it was necessary, and I’m reminded again of why I don’t often check luggage when I travel!!!

While standing there, I started thinking about the reasons for why I check bags instead of carrying them on the plane with me….and, of course, that got me thinking about how to decide what “baggage” to stow and what to keep with me in my coaching conversations.

There are some obvious times when I check my luggage rather than carry on – they typically have to do with the length of my trip and/or layover, and whether there are things in the bags that cannot be carried on. And while it may seem the obvious answer for what baggage to stow in a coaching conversation is “All of it!” let’s face it, if that were my point, this article would be very short and uninteresting. So allow me, if you will, to explore this a bit more.

While I do agree that the much of our “baggage” should be checked before venturing off on a journey of coaching, I think there might be times when it is helpful to have our trusty carry on.

We can agree that certain things should not be carried into the coaching conversation:

• Assumptions – about our client, their hopes, dreams, capabilities, motivation; about the topic, the “right” solution, the “wrong” solution…
• Expertise – about the issues or the person
• Ego/Pride – about our knowledge, skill, or ability to “help” the client
• Inner voice/conflict – the “stuff” we’ve got going through our heads on a given day: emotions, distractions…
• Biases – about the way things should be

In other words, as coaches we willingly suspend our own thinking about the topic our client brings, in order to help them focus their own thinking about the issue and about themselves.

But, what are some of the things that might be helpful to bring along on the journey? What can we “carry-on” that will benefit the client and honor our role as coach?

Here are some ideas that come to mind:

• Curiosity – what if we had a genuine curiosity about what was about the happen in the conversation…. about what the client was thinking…. what they might come up with? What if, rather than call upon our wisdom and expertise, we were intensely curious about what our clients were going to uncover in their exploration of themselves and their issue?
• Sense of wonder/expectation/belief – how would your coaching conversations be different if you approached them KNOWING that something great was about to happen, and you communicated that expectation to your clients? What if your belief in, and hope for, your clients was so overwhelming and apparent that it inspired your clients to dig deep and live in to those expectations and beliefs? What results might you see if you encouraged your clients in this way?
• Experiences – what can you bring from your own life experience that can help create awareness for you client. Not in a “here’s how you do it” way, but as an inspiration? How might your clients feel more free to explore their own hopes and dreams when you’ve been willing to share some of your own?
• Gut/instinct/intuition/Holy Spirit – This one can be tricky, but when we are willing to take a risk and trust our “gut”, we can add real power to our coaching conversations. To do this well, we have to be willing to hold our observations lightly and offer them up without attachment, encouraging the client to own whatever insights or new awareness she/he may experience.
• Open mind/heart – I hope you approach each coaching conversation ready to learn something new, to believe something new, or differently, or again…. bring an open heart and mind to each encounter and see what YOU can gain from the experience. You’ll gain a whole new level of trust with your client when you can demonstrate an openness to learning something new.

What about you? What goes into your “carry-on”. What can you bring into each coaching conversation that can change the dynamic for your clients and yourself? You can pack light, but you don’t have to check everything at the gate. Good luck on your journey!