Blog Post: Stop Stealing the Fruit of Your Client’s Work

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Todd is the youngest brother to attend the academy. Expectations are very high for his success. But Todd only feels defeat and dread. No matter his effort, he will fall short of the expectations.

Mr. Keating, Todd’s English teacher, believes that teaching Todd more facts about poetry is a waste of time until Todd is able to discover where poetry belongs in his own soul and life. The teacher can see the student’s talent but it will only matter when the student can see it for himself.

Encouragement only goes so far. Self-awareness is the power that moves the soul to a new height.

Encouragement only goes so far. Self-awareness is the power that moves the soul to a new height. Click To Tweet

This is the role of a coach – to help the client learn how her own knowledge and skill can work best in her own context.

Most of us don’t have Mr. Keating’s self-restraint. We want to help too much. We want to finish a sentence. We want to share our aha and steal that experience away from our client. We believe we are only helping by sharing our aha but truly we are robbing the client from the exhilaration of finding the truth all on their own.

Coaching facilitates client learning, but most of us approach coaching as a platform to pluck the ahas from the air and to display them before our client. We see coaching as a tool to let the client believe they discovered what we told them to be true.

If this is the case with you, you either need to set coaching aside so that you can consult or counsel, or you need to let go of harvesting fruitful ahas and become a facilitator of creating space so others can harvest a bounty of their very own genuine ahas. In the process, they learn that they really do have it inside.

Watching this excerpt from Dead Poet’s Society made me think that Mr. Keating is an exceptional coach.

Mr. Keating Believed Todd Had Everything He Needed to Succeed

In the words of Chad Hall, Mr. Keating “coached the person, not the problem.” The problem wasn’t that Todd couldn’t write a poem. The problem was that Todd couldn’t imagine there was anything worthwhile inside of him. Mr. Keating didn’t tell Todd how to begin the poem or how to meter the poem. With amazing presence, he partnered with Todd and brought enough belief for Todd to begin the process.

Mr. Keating Created a Safe Place for Todd to Open Himself Up

At one point, Mr. Keating covers Todd’s eyes. Great coaches put blinders on their clients from time to time to shield them from all the reasons they probably won’t succeed. We need to give our clients space to explore and dream and even fail because these are the ingredients required to achieve success.

Mr. Keating Let Todd Pick All the Fruit of His Effort

Once Todd begins to pour out his new learning, Mr. Keating shrinks away and let’s Todd enjoy all the fruit of his work. Mr. Keating refuses to do the work, refuses to take any credit, refuses to put any doubt into Todd’s mind about where this wonder came from. It came from the heart and soul of Todd himself. The applause at the end is for Todd not for Mr. Keating. The applause at the end will never be for us. It is for those we have lifted up.

As a result of writing this, I’m putting a note right in front of my computer where I do most of my coaching that says, “Don’t pick the client’s fruit.”

What will you do to remind yourself of this coaching truth?

2 thoughts on “Stop Stealing the Fruit of Your Client’s Work”

  1. Jocelyn Abernathy

    Brian, This is a masterful post on many levels.
    As Chad stated, “The problem wasn’t that Todd couldn’t write a poem. The problem was that Todd couldn’t imagine there was anything worthwhile inside of him.”

    This resonated with me. I do my client an injustice when I plaster my inside work on her chalkboard.
    Jocelyn

  2. Hi Brian! Our Pastor this past Sunday also shared a video piece from this movie. I am definitely now going to make some time to watch the entire movie. Thank you for sharing such an encouraging and insightful piece Brian. This is a great reminder for us coaches about the true role we play in the lives of our clients. “Lord, help me be this kind of coach to all of my clients in 2018. All this, in Jesus Name, I pray, Amen!”

    Thanks CAM!

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